The Dream to Write

I’ve grown up reading. My parents began this habit from when I was a toddler by reading me stories every night before bed. I couldn’t get enough of them. Of course I had my favorites like The Little Mouse, the Red Ripe Strawberry, and the Big Hungry Bear; Goodnight Moon, and Blackberry Ink, but I always wanted to read new books. Whenever I was able to read on my own I couldn’t stop. I read all different books I can even down to shampoo bottles in the shower. I love to read. And it’s a passion that has followed me into the precipice of adulthood. Barnes and Noble is my favorite place to kill time. I go there to relax and feel better. I’ll mill through the books passing by treasured favorites and into new lands. For a long time my favorite genre has been young adult fiction, but before you roll your eyes and think of Twilight that’s not exactly what I mean. I love dystopian novels.  There’s something about living in a world after ruin where oppression is rampid and striving for what you want is hard that completely envelops me. I get lost in books like those. My ultimate favorite series is Shatter Me. I mean I love it so much that the title of the third book Ignite Me is my first tattoo. Just ignite though, the full title would sound weird on my back. This book series inspired me. It starts with a girl who is locked in a mental institution and is completely unsure of herself. She overthinks everything in her life constantly erasing what she wants think to think what society tells her to think. She’s lost and defeated until she’s put to the test. Against the oppressive government and outside of her cell she’s forced to take a stand and fight for what she believes is right and what she wants. Throughout the series she realizes that things aren’t always what you first judge them as, that life and love are so much more complicated than what you know, but most importantly she learns to accept who she is and stand up to fight for what she wants. It’s incredible.

So now I have to realize what I want. Do I want to take an easy route, where I graduate and find a job in my degree make decent money but hate going to work and bored out of my mind. Or do I chase what I think I’ve always wanted, to write. I toyed in high school with writing stories. Every time a creative writing piece would be assigned in English I took it as an opportunity to compose a narrative. Even on my own I would write stories that would come to mind. Short daydreams of people in a world so different yet so comparable to ours that would captivate me excess thoughts. But of course, school and life would prevent me from ever being able to really explore the idea of my imagination. I feel that I have stories to tell and worlds to share, but I don’t think I would know how to become an author anyways. Not to mention that it would be a much harder and poorer life to live until I wrote something that people were interested in.

My dream is to travel and write. To somehow make money enough to have a happy home and travel the world and write about the wonders that I see and the people that are there. I feel like this is what would make me truly happy. They say that life is short and we need to chase our dreams and what would make us happy because if we don’t what are we doing with our lives. They usually leave out the part of how terrifying it can be. I suppose this is when we’re supposed to find the fire and courage within and fight for what we want.

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